To The Guy Who Had Me At Hello,But Never Said Goodbye
This was sent to me by a friend, so basically it's my friends write up not mine.
An Open Letter to the Guy Who Had Me at Hello, but Never Said Goodbye;
I never even knew if there was ever this fantasy called "you + me" to begin with. Never actually understood what to call what we had, or what "we" were.
But you know, you were the guy who made me feel all giddy and happy. You know how they say that someone makes you feel good when you get butterflies in your stomach? Mine crowded over me. You made me feel special and secure and you know what, loved, but I guess what we feel isn't what it really is. I loved you so much, maybe too much. Maybe for you my love was an overbearing, and our love for each other just did not match up; that was when we shattered.
I chose to narrow my lenses and see life as how I wanted it to look. I tricked myself into being happy and contented. I chose to let you build me up just to break me down. Because my feelings are mine, and my thoughts are mine, I also chose to blame myself. I caused myself this hurt because in the first place I fell in love with the thought of you.
Not to ever let you break down my wall which took me years to build, and see me crumble was the right thing to do, not the expedient thing to do. Just to let you know, I never searched for the easy way out; I undergone the whole process of getting your heart broken. And believe me, it felt dreadful at some point.
All was said and done, and nothing's left to say. You were just a thought; a beautiful idea. You had me at hello, and now I'm saying goodbye.
✍🏽 TNG
I never even knew if there was ever this fantasy called "you + me" to begin with. Never actually understood what to call what we had, or what "we" were.
But you know, you were the guy who made me feel all giddy and happy. You know how they say that someone makes you feel good when you get butterflies in your stomach? Mine crowded over me. You made me feel special and secure and you know what, loved, but I guess what we feel isn't what it really is. I loved you so much, maybe too much. Maybe for you my love was an overbearing, and our love for each other just did not match up; that was when we shattered.
I chose to narrow my lenses and see life as how I wanted it to look. I tricked myself into being happy and contented. I chose to let you build me up just to break me down. Because my feelings are mine, and my thoughts are mine, I also chose to blame myself. I caused myself this hurt because in the first place I fell in love with the thought of you.
Not to ever let you break down my wall which took me years to build, and see me crumble was the right thing to do, not the expedient thing to do. Just to let you know, I never searched for the easy way out; I undergone the whole process of getting your heart broken. And believe me, it felt dreadful at some point.
All was said and done, and nothing's left to say. You were just a thought; a beautiful idea. You had me at hello, and now I'm saying goodbye.
✍🏽 TNG
Will this make you stay?
May 13,2016
I miss you…
You have always been my favorite,
My favorite love
My favorite mistake
My favorite scar
My favorite heartbreak
Tell me, is it now too late?
I miss you…
You're still a part of me,
Part of my hope
Part of my stitches
Part of my dream
Part of my wishes
Tell me, are you still thinking of me?
I miss you…
But I guess you've moved on,
And here I am trying to find reasons to hold on.
Tell me, is that your only option?
I miss you…
I love you...
That's all I can say,
Tell me
Will that make you stay?
You have always been my favorite,
My favorite love
My favorite mistake
My favorite scar
My favorite heartbreak
Tell me, is it now too late?
I miss you…
You're still a part of me,
Part of my hope
Part of my stitches
Part of my dream
Part of my wishes
Tell me, are you still thinking of me?
I miss you…
But I guess you've moved on,
And here I am trying to find reasons to hold on.
Tell me, is that your only option?
I miss you…
I love you...
That's all I can say,
Tell me
Will that make you stay?
From Someone Who Lost His Universe
May 11,2016
You were my everything,
Someone I always wished would stay.
You were my everything,
Someone I thought would be there come what may.
After all this time,
I think I'll still love you for a lifetime.
This relationship has ended,
And I think my heart will never be mended.
I was sad and I felt blue,
But why didn't I feel you?
You are just two miles away,
Only one call from you will make my day.
You made me a promise and even swore to God
That you're never going to leave no matter what.
But then you did and my heart was cut,
And I didn't know what to say to my squad.
Lots of apologies,
Lots of understandings,
But despite all of that,
I'll never go away like a running cat.
I forgave you for your carelessness,
But I also hope you forgive me for all my flaws.
You said I was your happiness,
But then you left and I wished that was just a pause.
You're gone,
And I was left crying.
You gave up,
And I was close to dying.
One time, you asked me to stay,
And so I did.
But when I asked you to stay,
I also wished you did.
It was only a few days ago,
When you left the door.
But when you let me go,
I prayed it goes back to the way it was before.
You know without you, I'll never be happy,
But then why did you set me free?
I feel more than sappy,
And with your decision I don't agree.
I thank you for everything we had,
All those memories, good and bad.
I will never forget the love we shared,
And all the moments that we were paired.
I also ask for your forgiveness
For all my flaws and my mistakes,
The fights and all the stress.
But always know, that meeting you was a feeling of being more than blessed.
I'll always be thankful for you
For being a part of my life I never knew.
Remember that I'll be here patiently waiting for you,
Because I will always love you.
You are the one that I loved the most,
And also the one that I had lost.
But you'll always be my angel,
The angel with whom I fell for.
The star I'd always look up to,
Perhaps the universe I lost, when I lost you.
Someone I always wished would stay.
You were my everything,
Someone I thought would be there come what may.
After all this time,
I think I'll still love you for a lifetime.
This relationship has ended,
And I think my heart will never be mended.
I was sad and I felt blue,
But why didn't I feel you?
You are just two miles away,
Only one call from you will make my day.
You made me a promise and even swore to God
That you're never going to leave no matter what.
But then you did and my heart was cut,
And I didn't know what to say to my squad.
Lots of apologies,
Lots of understandings,
But despite all of that,
I'll never go away like a running cat.
I forgave you for your carelessness,
But I also hope you forgive me for all my flaws.
You said I was your happiness,
But then you left and I wished that was just a pause.
You're gone,
And I was left crying.
You gave up,
And I was close to dying.
One time, you asked me to stay,
And so I did.
But when I asked you to stay,
I also wished you did.
It was only a few days ago,
When you left the door.
But when you let me go,
I prayed it goes back to the way it was before.
You know without you, I'll never be happy,
But then why did you set me free?
I feel more than sappy,
And with your decision I don't agree.
I thank you for everything we had,
All those memories, good and bad.
I will never forget the love we shared,
And all the moments that we were paired.
I also ask for your forgiveness
For all my flaws and my mistakes,
The fights and all the stress.
But always know, that meeting you was a feeling of being more than blessed.
I'll always be thankful for you
For being a part of my life I never knew.
Remember that I'll be here patiently waiting for you,
Because I will always love you.
You are the one that I loved the most,
And also the one that I had lost.
But you'll always be my angel,
The angel with whom I fell for.
The star I'd always look up to,
Perhaps the universe I lost, when I lost you.
Actions That Confuse Need Words To Be Used
April 27,2016
"Action speaks louder than words." that saying has been long said and used, I mean I've heard it a thousand times that I feel like it's older than my ancestors. But I am always the girl full of doubts and what-if's. Always the girl who shows a brave persona, but really she's afraid of trying the why-not's. That is why I settle fror what-if's because I'm too afraid that my why-not would bring me down. And that fear resulted to where I am right now, afraid of taking risk in love--- I mean I already did fall for you, what I am afraid of is that if I tell you what I truly feel you might run away or even treat me like a stranger(and that's so terrifying and sad).
Right now I am in the middle of two oceans and I'm confused where to go. I'd like to risk and tell you how I feel because with the way you treat me. I feel so special, so secure and so loved(?) I guess. Or maybe these are all made by my stupid mind and betraying heart, perhaps a dream I'd never want to end. I don't know anymore, I don't know what to feel and how to act around you. I am so confused of what we have right now or is this even something.
They say I should believe with your actions, but what if you are just too friendly that I have mistaken those actions to be special but actually its just normal for you.
What if you just did it to impress some other girl and that girl is not me? But so much for the what-if's, I just want to tell you how I'd like to hear some words from you because it's action that speaks and words that assure.
To The Guy I love
April 25,2016
To the guy I love,
You know I have always been the hopeless romantic girl. The girl who'd always believe in love songs, soul mate and or grand romantic gestures by Ted Mosby in How I Met Your Mother.
Yes- I am independent and I am proud to say that. I love being by myself. To me, nothing is better than a good book on a rainy day. That being said I have always thought of a love story written by Nicholas Sparks or a plot like The Notebook or Love, Rosie.
I may have been influenced by the books and movies I have read and seen, but never in my life did I ever thought of falling in love--- of falling for you to be precise. At first you were really just a close friend and I also remember those times when I sweared I'd never like you. But guess what? Fate was playing tricks on me and cupid decided to hit me with his 'effin arrow of love. As soon as I knew I am inlove, then and there I decided to shut my mouth and close the doors of my heart in order to keep our friendship safe. But I guess you can't really keep what you feel for so long that everything bursted out like a bubble and gladly it didn't end up like a bubble too.
TBH, meeting you changed my life. Our “relationship,” wasn’t perfect, if you could even call it a relationship at all, but it was something. The two of us were terrified of getting hurt, but at the same time, too drawn in by one another to let it all go.
You changed me on such a deep, emotional level that I don’t even have the proper words to thank you. You had no idea you were doing it, either. The best thing you ever did for me was force me to open up after being the hopeless romantic and give me no choice but to grow as an individual. I will be forever grateful for that. You have opened up my eyes. You gave me more reason to continue to believe in everything- love songs, soul mates, cheesy romantic gestures and even The Notebook. You helped make me feel beautiful, intelligent, and most of all, capable of anything. The confidence you gave me allowed me, once and for all, to be myself, and be comfortable in doing so.
The fact of the matter is this: there are not many people in this world who are lucky enough to meet someone like you. I don’t know who I would be today if you never came into my life. I am such a different person and, even though there’s always room for improvement, I’m pretty proud of how far I’ve come. You helped me believe in so many wonderful, beautiful things that I would never have opened up my mind to before. I believe that fairytales do come true. And what's going to happen next,that-----we are clueless, but one thing is for sure I'd stay by your side as long as you want me to.
You know I have always been the hopeless romantic girl. The girl who'd always believe in love songs, soul mate and or grand romantic gestures by Ted Mosby in How I Met Your Mother.
Yes- I am independent and I am proud to say that. I love being by myself. To me, nothing is better than a good book on a rainy day. That being said I have always thought of a love story written by Nicholas Sparks or a plot like The Notebook or Love, Rosie.
I may have been influenced by the books and movies I have read and seen, but never in my life did I ever thought of falling in love--- of falling for you to be precise. At first you were really just a close friend and I also remember those times when I sweared I'd never like you. But guess what? Fate was playing tricks on me and cupid decided to hit me with his 'effin arrow of love. As soon as I knew I am inlove, then and there I decided to shut my mouth and close the doors of my heart in order to keep our friendship safe. But I guess you can't really keep what you feel for so long that everything bursted out like a bubble and gladly it didn't end up like a bubble too.
TBH, meeting you changed my life. Our “relationship,” wasn’t perfect, if you could even call it a relationship at all, but it was something. The two of us were terrified of getting hurt, but at the same time, too drawn in by one another to let it all go.
You changed me on such a deep, emotional level that I don’t even have the proper words to thank you. You had no idea you were doing it, either. The best thing you ever did for me was force me to open up after being the hopeless romantic and give me no choice but to grow as an individual. I will be forever grateful for that. You have opened up my eyes. You gave me more reason to continue to believe in everything- love songs, soul mates, cheesy romantic gestures and even The Notebook. You helped make me feel beautiful, intelligent, and most of all, capable of anything. The confidence you gave me allowed me, once and for all, to be myself, and be comfortable in doing so.
The fact of the matter is this: there are not many people in this world who are lucky enough to meet someone like you. I don’t know who I would be today if you never came into my life. I am such a different person and, even though there’s always room for improvement, I’m pretty proud of how far I’ve come. You helped me believe in so many wonderful, beautiful things that I would never have opened up my mind to before. I believe that fairytales do come true. And what's going to happen next,that-----we are clueless, but one thing is for sure I'd stay by your side as long as you want me to.
I Fell Inlove With A Friend
April 21,2016
P.S I wrote this blog for a friend. Hi friend 😁
Im sorry for making things complicated for us. If I had known, I would've kept my distance. If I had choice, I would've stopped myself from falling for you (like it was that easy).It's hard to write about you when the good memories we shared as "friends" flash back before me and I'm reminded over and over that no one could ever outdo you, because for months you've been the best man in my life(I mean you are the only guy I've been closest to) You've been the best of the best "friends" anyone could ask for.
I blame myself for dragging you into this situation but I realized neither of us wanted this. It just happened. That one night when we were together, I looked into your eyes and right then and there it got through my head that I wanted you more than I ever knew.
Since that day, I never felt the same whenever we're together. Holding your hand was destiny. The lines on our palms were drawn perfectly complementing one another like they have a story to tell. Our fingers intertwined like they never wanted to part. But it was torture too, knowing that you hold my hand only to leave traces on it. Because you were and never will be mine.
I was struggling to keep my feelings at bay by constantly reminding myself that you're somebody else's. I turned a blind eye to every hint that maybe, just maybe, you feel the same way. I looked the other way when I caught you staring at me, so my eyes won't have to pretend I wasn't hurting. But deep inside, the truth that you can't be mine hurt me like arrows(so many I find it hard to get through with the pain) shot right to my chest
We promised never to keep secrets from each other like how other friends do. But honestly, I've been dishonest with you. I could tell you all my secrets but never the one that I'm deeply in love with you. Even when my heart's already bursting with all the feelings I have, I chose not to tell you because our friendship isn't worth jeopardizing.
"If you love someone, you say it. You say it right then, out loud. Otherwise, the moment just passes you by."
But this isn't always the case and it isn't as easy as it sounds. I let the moment pass so many times and now I'm left with no choice but to watch you love her. I am weak but if being weak means your happiness then I'd rather not fight. I lost without even fighting.
Still, I chose to stay behind cheering for you on your every triumph and every loss while she's there standing beside you. I put you first all the time but I felt I was only your second. I would wrestle all the demons just to keep you safe. I cared less about myself. That's how a friend should love her friend, right?
Now my heart is all broken and many have said that a friend is all you need to help you with all the heartbreaks and the heartaches. But what am I gonna do when the friend that's supposed to help me get through with this is the reason why I am in this sad and unfortunate situation?
I blame myself for dragging you into this situation but I realized neither of us wanted this. It just happened. That one night when we were together, I looked into your eyes and right then and there it got through my head that I wanted you more than I ever knew.
Since that day, I never felt the same whenever we're together. Holding your hand was destiny. The lines on our palms were drawn perfectly complementing one another like they have a story to tell. Our fingers intertwined like they never wanted to part. But it was torture too, knowing that you hold my hand only to leave traces on it. Because you were and never will be mine.
I was struggling to keep my feelings at bay by constantly reminding myself that you're somebody else's. I turned a blind eye to every hint that maybe, just maybe, you feel the same way. I looked the other way when I caught you staring at me, so my eyes won't have to pretend I wasn't hurting. But deep inside, the truth that you can't be mine hurt me like arrows(so many I find it hard to get through with the pain) shot right to my chest
We promised never to keep secrets from each other like how other friends do. But honestly, I've been dishonest with you. I could tell you all my secrets but never the one that I'm deeply in love with you. Even when my heart's already bursting with all the feelings I have, I chose not to tell you because our friendship isn't worth jeopardizing.
"If you love someone, you say it. You say it right then, out loud. Otherwise, the moment just passes you by."
But this isn't always the case and it isn't as easy as it sounds. I let the moment pass so many times and now I'm left with no choice but to watch you love her. I am weak but if being weak means your happiness then I'd rather not fight. I lost without even fighting.
Still, I chose to stay behind cheering for you on your every triumph and every loss while she's there standing beside you. I put you first all the time but I felt I was only your second. I would wrestle all the demons just to keep you safe. I cared less about myself. That's how a friend should love her friend, right?
Now my heart is all broken and many have said that a friend is all you need to help you with all the heartbreaks and the heartaches. But what am I gonna do when the friend that's supposed to help me get through with this is the reason why I am in this sad and unfortunate situation?
The Girl With Unrequited Love
April 20,2016
To the boy I am hopelessly inlove with,
"I like the way he looks at me. Like I want to believe in myself" —Serena Van der Woodsen
First of all, I want to let you know, I am not desperate and I'm not basing my happiness on finding my one, perfect love. I am the girl, you sit beside with every day in school, with a serious look on her face, pretending I don't care. I am the girl, you've always thought of as outspoken, someone who is crazy and bipolar. I am the noisy girl who eats chocolate cake secretly at the library or the girl who is constantly feeling terrible at how her grades turned out. I am the smart, non-conformist, and talkative girl you've always thought of. Partly, yes maybe. Although you should know, I am the girl who secretly hopes for you.
Sometimes, I wonder how I got here or how I've ever known you. My feelings stand between infatuation and love, but I still want to believe that this is just a case of simple attraction. I felt it, when you held my hands and told me, "You can do it" when hope was not clear and loneliness reigns. My friends told me I am being friendzoned—but then again it hits me like a big truck that I am just your friend, the funny girl you always laugh with.
I blame my books for putting me in a fairytale mentality, putting me up with the belief of destiny and fate. Thinking there would be that perfect slow motion moment when you and I suddenly meet. But that just isn't right, because I knew we were never really for each other. You have never thought of me as a girl who is in love, but a girl who is reading and fantasizing about her dreams in life. Often, I am blabbing about how frustrated I am with my exam grades but really I just want to hear you say, "It's okay." However, this is not a movie nor a John Green book. And, I am no Shailene Woodley or Chloe Grace Moretz
There were times when I couldn't experience something without wishing you were there to see it, too. I will wait for you to talk to me and when you don't, I'd still wait. I will wait for that beep on my phone, or that moment will we will magically bump into each other and you'll throw a quick "hi" my way, but I'll always go the other way. Things get awkward and I don't always get noticed. Sometimes, I'd look at you and I'll pretend I was looking for someone or I'll act as if I am busy with school stuff. There are days, when I will call for you and ask you about our homework, trying to be nonchalant about it, but deep inside my heart keeps on beating. You took my breath away and you still have no idea.
I keep on writing about you and tomorrow you'd ask me about this, maybe even ask, "Who's this for?" But you'll never know that this is about you, because I'll tell you it's fictional and I'll laugh and tell you jokes. But all I want is for you to know, that this is how I feel for you. But I'll never tell.
Standing between love and infatuation,
The Girl with Unrequited Love
"I like the way he looks at me. Like I want to believe in myself" —Serena Van der Woodsen
First of all, I want to let you know, I am not desperate and I'm not basing my happiness on finding my one, perfect love. I am the girl, you sit beside with every day in school, with a serious look on her face, pretending I don't care. I am the girl, you've always thought of as outspoken, someone who is crazy and bipolar. I am the noisy girl who eats chocolate cake secretly at the library or the girl who is constantly feeling terrible at how her grades turned out. I am the smart, non-conformist, and talkative girl you've always thought of. Partly, yes maybe. Although you should know, I am the girl who secretly hopes for you.
Sometimes, I wonder how I got here or how I've ever known you. My feelings stand between infatuation and love, but I still want to believe that this is just a case of simple attraction. I felt it, when you held my hands and told me, "You can do it" when hope was not clear and loneliness reigns. My friends told me I am being friendzoned—but then again it hits me like a big truck that I am just your friend, the funny girl you always laugh with.
I blame my books for putting me in a fairytale mentality, putting me up with the belief of destiny and fate. Thinking there would be that perfect slow motion moment when you and I suddenly meet. But that just isn't right, because I knew we were never really for each other. You have never thought of me as a girl who is in love, but a girl who is reading and fantasizing about her dreams in life. Often, I am blabbing about how frustrated I am with my exam grades but really I just want to hear you say, "It's okay." However, this is not a movie nor a John Green book. And, I am no Shailene Woodley or Chloe Grace Moretz
There were times when I couldn't experience something without wishing you were there to see it, too. I will wait for you to talk to me and when you don't, I'd still wait. I will wait for that beep on my phone, or that moment will we will magically bump into each other and you'll throw a quick "hi" my way, but I'll always go the other way. Things get awkward and I don't always get noticed. Sometimes, I'd look at you and I'll pretend I was looking for someone or I'll act as if I am busy with school stuff. There are days, when I will call for you and ask you about our homework, trying to be nonchalant about it, but deep inside my heart keeps on beating. You took my breath away and you still have no idea.
I keep on writing about you and tomorrow you'd ask me about this, maybe even ask, "Who's this for?" But you'll never know that this is about you, because I'll tell you it's fictional and I'll laugh and tell you jokes. But all I want is for you to know, that this is how I feel for you. But I'll never tell.
Standing between love and infatuation,
The Girl with Unrequited Love
A Note For Every Girl Out There
April 20,2016
When I was little, growing up soonest was always on my wish list. Alongside my dreams like becoming a doctor, a lawyer, a princess, and finding Prince Charming. Everything sounds easy when you're a child. Even wearing fancy shimmering dresses sound like a pretty normal thing. It seems like all you desire is within your grasp. Who could blame a little girl for thinking that life was a fairytale?
I've always thought that you grow up as time goes by, but I was wrong. You grow old as time passes, but that doesn't really mean that you are growing up as well. It is a whole different thing. A concept that isn't as simple as it sounds.
Growing up is beautiful and scary at the same time. It's like going somewhere you've never been to. Living with people you've never met before. But the good thing is it just feels like that, you need not worry because you'll be surrounded with the people that matter and love you so much. It's just that we have the tendency of overlooking them because a lot of uncertainties cloud our vision.
As we grow old, we learn more and question more. We become more aware of our surroundings, see its beauty and also its not-so beautiful side. We realize that life isn't the kingdom surrounded with flowers and not all boys are gorgeous Prince Charmings in their shining armors ready to rescue the damsel in distress. And princesses with colorful glittering dresses aren't all princesses inside. Sadly, most of them are just disguised witches. Girls who may look like royalty, but are hags with the heart of a villain. That the music would sound gloomy often times and that it isn't a wonderful dance into Happily Ever After.
Life may not be the fairytale we've always thought of. Here's how to live it like a real princess: don't succumb to the villain's mischief, prove to the imperfect Prince Charming that you'll still love him even with all his flaws. Wake up, Princess and stop waiting for fairy god-mother to do things for you. Your happy ending is in your hands.
I've always thought that you grow up as time goes by, but I was wrong. You grow old as time passes, but that doesn't really mean that you are growing up as well. It is a whole different thing. A concept that isn't as simple as it sounds.
Growing up is beautiful and scary at the same time. It's like going somewhere you've never been to. Living with people you've never met before. But the good thing is it just feels like that, you need not worry because you'll be surrounded with the people that matter and love you so much. It's just that we have the tendency of overlooking them because a lot of uncertainties cloud our vision.
As we grow old, we learn more and question more. We become more aware of our surroundings, see its beauty and also its not-so beautiful side. We realize that life isn't the kingdom surrounded with flowers and not all boys are gorgeous Prince Charmings in their shining armors ready to rescue the damsel in distress. And princesses with colorful glittering dresses aren't all princesses inside. Sadly, most of them are just disguised witches. Girls who may look like royalty, but are hags with the heart of a villain. That the music would sound gloomy often times and that it isn't a wonderful dance into Happily Ever After.
Life may not be the fairytale we've always thought of. Here's how to live it like a real princess: don't succumb to the villain's mischief, prove to the imperfect Prince Charming that you'll still love him even with all his flaws. Wake up, Princess and stop waiting for fairy god-mother to do things for you. Your happy ending is in your hands.